Never discredit your gut instinct. You’re not being paranoid. Your body can pick up vibrations, some better than others, and if something deep inside you says something’s not right about a person or situation, trust it and keep it pushing. 

I did and once again I was right. It happens way to often. -_-

'Fuck A Fake Friend, Where your real friends at?'

Nowhere. That’s where. Abso-fucking-lutely nowhere. I swear the more I’ve thought about the whole situation the more sadder while at the same time more angrier I’ve become over it. Best friends for 5 years.. 5 fucking years and this is what I got out of it. I was there for every boyfriend and girlfriend you had in that period of time. For every break up you had. For every family member and friend that ever turned their backs on you and treated you like shit. For all the turbulence in your life for 5 years I was there. I sure as FUCK didn’t see anybody else running to be there for you like I always did. But then, I guess I’m stupid. Because you’ve never really done the same for me. Everything has always been rather uneven between us. I’ve pretty much always put more effort into our friendship then you really ever have. Thinking back on it now you got so angry at me one time and said I wasn’t there for you and didn’t give a shit about you when you were suicidal. Your reasoning behind thinking this? Because I didn’t call the cops from another state,1 because I didn’t know you could & 2 because it had already been done. I wasn’t even awake and you nor anybody else had attempted to contact me. I woke up to this whole thing going on. All I could do was call you over and over hoping you would answer. But you didn’t. I was hundreds of miles away it’s not like I could just walk through your door and come looking for you. But, you did this to me and so in anger I deleted you because in all honesty, they may have called the cops that day but they weren’t there for you for all of the shit leading up to that moment. I WAS and you treated me like the shit on the bottom of your shoe because the situation was out of my control. Yet after a few months we worked things out, or so I thought, and I continued to stick by your side through everything else. While you ditched me and treated me like shit for dudes, quit talking to me unless you had something to bitch about, never checked on me or asked how I was doing, and while you treated others better then you ever did me. I even went so far as to send you money to pay for your washer and dryer so you wouldn’t lose and you NEVER did anything like that for me. I even did one better then that and even though I invited you to my wedding,you said you wanted to be there and you should’ve paid for your own way. Instead, I bought ALL of your plane tickets,your luggage,your food and everything. What did I get in return? You ignoring me most of the fucking time you were here even after you said you wouldn’t do that. You stayed up in the loft with your fucking trifling boyfriend (my roommate and other supposed friend) and the only times you’d talk to me is if you were downstairs,outside with me or hollering from my loft to me downstairs. Then when I went with you to Ohio instead of going home with my husband to help YOU through your things with your dad and your grief you treated me like shit and ignored me most of the time there then to. Left me in your fucking living room downstairs with no tv or anything. Like the dog you left in the fucking basement. You stupid fucking bitch. I even made sure you had food to eat when you wanted it and a 12 pack of sodas and all you did for me was buy me a fucking 2 liter. Then to make things worse you went behind my back and was telling your fucking boyfriend every thing I was saying when it was meant to stay between us because I was venting! I NEVER did that to you EVER when you had shit to say about your boyfriends or my ex! You even fucking decided to stay with your piece of shit boyfriend AFTER he lied to you and to me! After he used me and my husband and then was just going to take his leave like it was no big deal! SO FUCK YOU. I DESERVE BETTER. 


I should get some new friends who actually give a fuck about me and ask me to hangout and don’t treat me like dirt. Hahaha ha ha  hahahahahaha.

This so much right now it’s sickening to be honest.

(WARNING: Rant Incoming) I’m So Done.. Just So Done..

Hey kids! it’s rant and story time! Yayyy! *sarcasm*

So, I have a room mate. We’ll call him J. We didn’t HAVE to have a room mate but he needed somewhere to go and he was a friend. We had a empty loft upstairs. So we let him move in and having sympathy for him we didn’t make him get a job,pay rent,utilities or anything else. We paid for everything. He drove my electric bill up the whole time he was living with us because he kept fucking leaving my lights on all over my apartment. Especially in our closet upstairs. He’d turn it on and not turn it back off for 12 hours or more because he ‘forgot’. He’d also do something similar with the light in our stairwell. He stayed up all night,slept all day, and stayed on his Xbox. We never ONCE bitched at him about it. Then he met some chick online and after 2 weeks of being with her he moved out and moved to TX.

So here we are on round #2. About 3 months into it they started fighting a lot and she started controlling him and acting like a crazy bitch. So once again he came to me and I told him if he needed to come back then he could BUT there would be conditions this time. I told him if he came back that he would have to help with food, find a job, go to school, or do both, help around the house, and help with food. So he agree’d and then booked his ticket back here and returned and once again I let him have the loft upstairs. 

I had to leave a day or so before he got here. While I was gone I was told he had some money with him and we needed help with groceries now that he was there. I know he showed up $200 originally. He told my husband that he could only give us $35 for groceries and already I want to kill him but I’m out of town so not much I could do. We move along and once again he’s started with this bullshit of leaving lights on. I got my bill later in the month and liked to have killed him. THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?! STOP LEAVING MY LIGHTS ON YOU FUCKER! YOU’RE NOT PAYING THE DAMN BILL! Anyway, so we asked him not to leave lights on. He still continued to do it and by the time I had gotten what would be my 2nd bill since he had been here it was all the way up to 133 fucking dollars! While that may not be a lot to some it is to me because my bill before he showed up was no more then 118 when it was at it’s highest before he moved back in. He once again was up all night, sleeping all day, barely helping around the house and when he did the cleaning it was SO half-assed. Like he would do 1 or 2 loads of dishes and overload the damn thing despite being told not to do that. He would leave the stove and counters all nasty and when it came to taking the garbage out he would do half of it and then look at one of us and go ‘the other half if yours.’. THE FUCK YOU MEAN?! NO,just NO SIR. When you take that shit out you take ALL of it out. You don’t do shit else and you live in my house RENT FREE. TAKE IT OUT! He cooked maybe 1 or 2 times the whole time he’s been here. Just what the fuck is your problem dude?! STOP BEING FUCKING LAZY! 

Anywayyyyy, forwarding to between the end of June and now. Same shit is still going on with absolutely no end in sight. I bought his plane ticket to and from Ky to be with us for our wedding, my husband and I and his girlfriend bought his food the whole time. We even had to put back one of our bills to be able too afford feeding everyone the rest of the time because we were running short of money. He was supposed to help us pay it. This is the only time we’ve ever asked him to help pay a bill. The day before our wedding we found out his girlfriend’s (my supposed to be best friend) dad passed away of a massive heart attack. She couldn’t go home right away and was trying to make travel arrangements so they attended my wedding. Then the 3 of us were picked up by her mom and we went to OH so we could be there for her through this whole thing. The whole time J straight up acted a damn fool. Then he started getting shady and trying to insert himself into certain situations he didn’t need to be in. He was pretty much trying to weasel his way in so he wouldn’t have to leave OH despite being told he couldn’t stay up there many times. He also started telling her things he wasn’t telling me and vice versa. So then I started seeing he was being shady and shit. He didn’t want to give me updates on when he’d get the money he was promising me even after I left. I finally got tired of waiting to find out when he was coming back and trying to figure out when we were going the money I told his girlfriend and she talked to him. He then told me he would be back in ‘a week or so.’ THE FUCK? YOU LIVE HERE!! BRING YOUR ASS BACK AND HELP TAKE CARE OF RESPONSIBILITIES!! Here we are almost 2 weeks later and he still hasn’t attempted to come back. Last night I found out that he suddenly now has decided he’s going to leave after all the shit we did for his ass as soon as he gets back and pays his part of the phone bill. So basically I feel like we were used until he got all he wanted and now he’s gonna bolt for the door. Because I guess it’s too much to actually come fucking back and get a job and help the people who’ve been helping your ass for a total of 6 months before you just decide to take off and leave. GROW UP. STOP ACTING LIKE AN IMMATURE FUCK RUNNING AROUND BUMMING OFF PEOPLE AND JUMPING FROM HOUSE TO HOUSE AND STATE TO STATE ON EVERYONE’S FUCKING DIME! Oh and don’t fucking tell me one thing and then tell your girlfriend another and then come to me like you told me the same shit. YOU DIDN’T! SO FUCK OFF YOU DISHONEST AND IMMATURE FUCKING BUM! You’re shit is packed and you’re out of my door the minute you get here. Good luck with that. 



This Comcast call makes me want to gouge my eyes out. I can’t believe the guy stayed so calm.

I also really don’t get why the rep cared so much. Is his dad the CEO? lol

I listened to that!!

I wanted to pull my hair out, yell, and hang up for the guy….

OMG. They did the same thing to me when I tried to leave. Like the lady was getting on a really creepy level with it. Then I finally got it all dealt with and then soon after I kept getting these letters saying to come back. I’m like this, this is like getting a letter from a creepy stalker ex after you just broke up with them. *shivers* 


I probably went and shopped and bought a little more then I should’ve, but whatever. No Regrets. :P



having anxiety and depression is like being scared and tired at the same time. it’s the fear of failure but no urge to be productive, and it’s wanting friends while hating socializing. it’s like running a marathon with the willpower of a corpse because you want to get to the end but you also want to sleep and evaporate into the soil and become compost for snails and flowers because then at least you’re useful


So much truth. 

"I cannot believe in a God who wants to be praised all the time."
-Friedrich Nietzsche (via vainajala)
Reblog if you’re currently unhappy with your body.